While sitting in a coffee shop I make a fell swoop with my left arm and knock over my water glass.  As fast as it tumbles is as slow as it seems.  Seconds perceived as minutes as I watch gravity take it’s course.

3 feet

I look up as soon as it happens to see if anyone else has noticed my mistake.  Making eye contact with at least two other people.  One smiling.  One who’s fear seems equally matched to mine.

“We ride in the terror of wind, my friend.”

2.5 feet

My eyes go to the water glass which has yet to spill an ounce of water.  Quickly I get the idea to reach for it.  With my Spidey reflexes I yank my arm out as swiftly as possible barely missing and knocking the glass horizontally.  “It’s too late,” I think to myself.  This is the end of my suave existence as the cool guy reading a book in the corner.

2 feet

I immediately think to myself that it’s not too late to just pack up and run away.  I can put up my laptop and chug my coffee faster then a cowboy can draw his gun at noon.  I close my laptop…

1 foot

That foot went by faster then disco rocked.  Packing up was no longer an option.  I must brace myself and own up to the embarrassment about to unfold before.  Laughter from all directions, judgmental pointed fingers, Snapchats being snapped, and tweets being Twittered.  This was how I would be remembered by all these strangers.

.25 feet

I hold my head down in shame.  Close my eyes.  Wait for the earth shattering sound that’ll determine the rest of my existence on this blue marble.  I inhale.

0 feet

The sharp fragments frail thoroughly through the proximity of my workspace.  All eyes on me.  This was the test of my character.  The audience is waiting for my reaction before they too can react.  This was my broadway show.  I uncontrollably smile and lightly laugh.  My heart racing as I await the sure “boos” of the auditorium.

Crickets chirp.  Tumbleweed tumbles.  Silence beckons.  It’s done.  The show is over.  An employee sweeps up the mess as fluidly as a curtain closes on stage.

I bow, and exit stage right.