I have school every weekday from around 10am-2pm, and an additional 5:30pm-8pm class on Thursday.  I work from 5pm-11pm every Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday.  I have one day to relax, and one evening to unwind.  It’s hard.  There’s so much I want to do.  So much I don’t have time for.  I think that’s why I stay up until the ends of night, using the time I normally trade for sleep.

This year, I wanted to get involved with school.  I wanted to join clubs, programs, and everything.  I wanted to spend time with the friends I hold dear to my heart.  I wanted someone to give my heart to.  And I wanted every waking moment to be the most amazing adventure of a lifetime.  Of course, I knew none of this would play out.  As my summer ticked it’s final seconds, I knew this year would be different.  I knew it wouldn’t be the same.  So I embraced it, I told myself not to compare the past with the present…  Do not view this year as a new chapter — view it as a new book.

I want to tell you I look at my present like this, but I don’t want to lie.  Honestly, I’m not too fond of the new year. I sadly hold onto the past.  I always have.  But it’s okay, I’ll get over it.  I’m just a dreamer.

Tonight I came home from work around 11pm.  I got dinner with friends, and we came home and smoked hookah.  I enjoy the company.  They went home around 1:30am.  Then I caught up on news.  I read a few chapters of a book.  I practiced some guitar.  And now I’m holding onto the last remnants before I repeat the same day…. over and over again.

Over and over….

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