I have school every weekday from around 10am-2pm, and an additional 5:30pm-8pm class on Thursday. I work from 5pm-11pm every Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday. I have one day to relax, and one evening to unwind. It’s hard. There’s so much I want to do. So much I don’t have time for. I think that’s why I stay up until the ends of night, using the time I normally trade for sleep.
This year, I wanted to get involved with school. I wanted to join clubs, programs, and everything. I wanted to spend time with the friends I hold dear to my heart. I wanted someone to give my heart to. And I wanted every waking moment to be the most amazing adventure of a lifetime. Of course, I knew none of this would play out. As my summer ticked it’s final seconds, I knew this year would be different. I knew it wouldn’t be the same. So I embraced it, I told myself not to compare the past with the present… Do not view this year as a new chapter — view it as a new book.
I want to tell you I look at my present like this, but I don’t want to lie. Honestly, I’m not too fond of the new year. I sadly hold onto the past. I always have. But it’s okay, I’ll get over it. I’m just a dreamer.
Tonight I came home from work around 11pm. I got dinner with friends, and we came home and smoked hookah. I enjoy the company. They went home around 1:30am. Then I caught up on news. I read a few chapters of a book. I practiced some guitar. And now I’m holding onto the last remnants before I repeat the same day…. over and over again.
Over and over….