Pause.

The night before my birthday I flipped a coin into a fountain and made a wish.

Since I was little, I’ve wished for the same thing every time.  I did this because I thought I came up with the perfect wish, something remotely vague, yet not at all possible to have the chance to go array.  It was just enough relevant and I also figured if I would think about the subject while stating my wish, that it would have the exact effect I wanted it to have.   However, the problem with this wish is that it was too generalized, and I accepted the fact that I never saw concrete results because of this, and because the wish could come true from the moment I made the wish — till eternity.

So, when I walked up to the fountain on my favourite street with a quarter in my pocket, I knew exactly what to wish for.   However… there was something on my mind, something my heart wants and something my mind thought a bit of magic wouldn’t hurt.  So for the first time, in a very long time, I wished for something different.  Fifteen minutes later, I received a text that seemed to be something the wish had conjured up.   It was extraordinary, and I felt forever in debt to the magical fountain people.

Seventeen days later, I’m here in my room, and I’m hoping for this summer to just go by so much faster.  So I can just go back to the way things were before I had to leave back to here.  Everything was great then.  Absolutely everything.  I had never been happier.  And now I feel like everything is on pause.  Pause on my fantastic friends.  Pause on my relationships.  Pause on my adventures.  Pause on my progression.  And pause on everything.

The weeks before I had to leave back here to Clarksville I dreaded them so much.  Not because I had to come back here, and not because I hate Clarksville, but rather, I dreaded coming back here so much, due to all the people I would have to leave behind.  But I told myself this summer would be the best yet, because I would make it the best ever.  And I would make new memories that would fill my heart forever.  However, this summer has been anything but.

I know it’s only the end of May, and I still have two and half months left, so things could go up.  But right now… I’m just so tired of this.  I’m tired of laying on my floor playing video games, watching Netflix, smoking hookah, and doing nothing.  I just… ….  I think you get it…

I need to find another fountain, and wish for that previous wish to come true.

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